I gave birth to my 2nd child last Sunday. It was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done, even compared to my first delivery, but also amazing. The midwife had me reach down at the end and help guide my daughter out to lift her directly onto me, which actually is something I never imagined doing but a memory that I’ll cherish until I die.
This week, I’ve been mostly confined upstairs to recuperate, getting food delivered to me, sleeping and cuddling the baby and playing board games with my son as I’m up to it and reading a lot. I briefly went out a couple of days ago for the first doctor’s appointment, and it took so much out of me that I started crying as soon as I sat down in the car. I’m feeling much better today, and I’m hoping to get to slowly start making my way downstairs next week, and if this heat ever breaks, to start getting out for slow walks with my family. Because while the rest has been necessary, I also feel the hint of stir-crazy starting to make itself known. Healing myself is the most important step, though, so I have the energy to later do what I want to do.
My mother and husband have been wonderful this week taking care of me and the children, my in-laws who came in to watch my son while we were delivering left us stocked up with food and even made an effort to buy more organic/whole foods than they’ve ever done for us before, my father is coming next week to get some work done on our house and finally install our water filter, my doula has been out several times to do whatever we need done, and I have offers for next week as well of help from other people. It’s amazing how family and friends will come together to help when it’s needed, and even when you don’t know that you necessarily need it.
My doula said she sees one more daughter for me, but we’re done for the time being. It wouldn’t be fiscally or socially responsible for us at this point to have more. Maybe I’ll wind up with a surprise pregnancy later in life or something, though if I do, I hope I’m still physically strong enough to deliver without interventions.
Anyway, I love watching my daughter grow day by day. She’s already so strong she is nearly flipping herself over, she started doing half smiles within the first 24 hours in response to certain voices, and there is something comforting about being able to fulfill someone’s emotional needs just by being physically close to them. I imagine that I’ll feel “touched out” on occasion, as I did experience that with my son, but for now, as I type one handed with a newborn sprawled across my chest, I’m just enjoying it.