Going Easy

I have finally embraced the new routine, such as it is. Taking joy in the kids, having some meaningful time and deep discussions with my husband, being creative as I feel up to it. Taking odd sewing jobs as they come. But no longer beating myself up for what isn’t getting done or for taking time to just be. Finding joy and peace and calm in the chaos.

Because the world is chaos. And I won’t stand back and watch it burn, but I also won’t fall to pieces about it. I’m just keeping my eyes open, soaking everything in, and doing what I can to raise two decent human beings while hoping I can help create a future for them. There are too many variables at play.

I do still believe that this is a necessary purging for us still. That all the decay and filth needs to rise to the surface so we can skim it off. But we have to be willing to do that work, and I don’t know that enough of us are. I have to hope so.

Whatever comes, life sure is interesting these days.

I am a Zombie

I’m exhausted and stressed and feeling worn down.  My eyes are bleary today, aided by my allergies in being even more heavy-lidded.  My day job has been a whirlwind of activity, as I fill every moment with either wrapping things up here or planning the move or sneaking a few precious minutes in to work creatively.  I wonder if I can get through the next few weeks without burning out or melting down.

But I’m also excited at embarking on this new journey.  And I’m happy to be doing the work that I’m doing to push myself forward.  It means so much to be seizing the reigns of my life and steering myself in a different direction.  Change is never easy, but it is good for growth.